exhausted yet fulfilled
By about 1:30 today I was feeling pretty exhausted. As I mentioned in my previous post, I have been working on a lot of things trying to get caught up and doing my best to put my full energy and heart into our homeschool (along with all the other regular life stuff). I think we're doing pretty well, but boy, it's no small effort! That's why at around 1:30 I was scooting the boys out the door so they could play a while and run around in the backyard while I could sit down and take a break for a few minutes! My whole body felt weary! As I sat having a few moments of quiet I thought to myself, there's nothing and no one I'd rather wear myself out for than these kids. It reminded me of one of my favorite quotes:
"I don't want to drive up to the pearly gates in a shiny sports car, wearing beautifully, tailored clothes, my hair expertly coiffed, and with long, perfectly manicured fingernails.
I want to drive up in a station wagon that has mud on the wheels from taking kids to scout camp.
I want to be there with a smudge of peanut butter on my shirt from making sandwiches for a sick neighbors children.
I want to be there with a little dirt under my fingernails from helping to weed someone's garden.
I want to be there with children's sticky kisses on my cheeks and the tears of a friend on my shoulder.
I want the Lord to know I was really here and that I really lived." -Marjorie Pay Hinckley
I love those words! When it's all said and done, I think I will be happy looking back and feeling like I gave it my all. So it's okay to feel a little tired (or even a lot tired). And it's okay to feel stretched. Because if I'm not giving it my all, what kind of conversation will I have with the Lord when that day comes?
After a few (very few) moments of quiet, the boys came back in and told me they were ready to go on our outing. Truthfully, I felt like taking a nap! But my husband came downstairs from working and told us he would come with us too (hooray)! So we went to one of our favorite places as a family. We went to This is the Place. It has a bunch of early Pioneer buildings along with activities for children. We all love going there. We got fresh donuts, ran around and laughed in the perfect October sunshine. The boys went in a little barbershop and had their beards shaved (it was the cutest!) The October day could not have been more beautiful. Afterwords we drove up the canyon and talked. I came away feeling renewed. Still exhausted from a full week, but at the same time fulfilled because I love what I am doing. I'm thankful to live in a beautiful world and spend time with my family. I'm grateful that God provides us with the insight we need to get us through the hard parts. xo